This has been around for a few months, but I laugh out loud every time I read it, so I thought I'd share:
How EVE University fights their wars
by Patri Allin
How we fight a war -
We form a Grand Blob with 3 people who have been to lots of wars, 20 people who have just taken the tackling class, 5 people who are wondering what a "TS" is, and 1 person who is so new they think this is part of the tutorial. It takes us 10 minutes to figure out if we are a "tackler" or an "EW", and we haven't even left the station yet.
We find the enemy. As Leader #1 "calls a primary" 4 people put their vote in gang chat, then Leader #2 says "Jam that guy" and somewhere someone stands up from their computer and starts to do the "Hammer", And although nobody ever quite realizes this is what happened, Leader #3 has already been podded by 5 of our own guys who are now super excited they killed an enemy Battleship.
After the dust clears we've got 5 people left - shot 5 of the enemy (net loss 45) and for us this is a MASSIVE FREAKIN VICTORY! It is too cause our ships cost 1mil each and thiers about 200. We try to remember which way is home and then fly off in the wrong direction as somewhere nearby, sitting in their pod in a station, someone is thinking this is the best tutorial in an MMO ever.
:)
Friday, December 21, 2007
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